Hard times and the free press

You're the publisher of a print newspaper, part of an industry which had been slipping inexorably away in good times, and now times aren't good, are in fact as bad as anyone born after the Great Depression can recall. Advertising revenue which had been eroding for years is now dropping at a pace which is frankly incompatible with survival.

Election season rolls around and you're hanging on like grim death, knowing a flood of political ads will carry you for a while and - who knows? - maybe things will get better. But you have a problem. The biggest spenders, the deepest pockets in this election, belong to some folks that you just happen to have the goods on, and I mean THE GOODS, the kind that will torpedo a career, will halt Deep Pockets in his or her tracks.

Editorially, how can you bring yourself to even mildly endorse these candidates? You know where the bodies are buried. Can you wish it all away, turn the other check ur, uh ... cheek, and grab that desperately needed ad money? Hell, if you even contemplate going for the dough, how can you call yourself a "journalist?"

The Fourth Estate is in for one hell of a rough ride.

Hot times in the county law department

Law Director Bill Lockett is a busy man this week. He's sent out notice of a 10 a.m. Monday (Feb. 9) press conference dealing with Natural Resources Recovery and followed that up with a letter to all 19 County Commissioners telling them to get the heck off any boards or committees for which commission had appointive powers. The former issue is a ticking time bomb for the county, and the latter - well, let's just say it's time such an obvious conflict of interest was addressed.

Sic 'em, Bill!

The sheriff's cars (from the "I wish I had said that" Department)

Someone I know (and I won't say who, not even if you ram bamboo splints under my nails) recently opined on the puzzling reluctance or inability of the Knox County Sheriff's Office to provide details on its fleet. Taking note of the news that a deputy's cruiser caught fire the other day, the mystery person said:

"Obviously, this is why KCSO can't account for all of their vehicles. They spontaneously combust from time to time."

Bada bing! 

Stimulus - coming to a road near you!

The economy is bad, in some ways as bad as it's ever been in the U.S., the Great Depression included. No, we haven't seen 25% unemployment rates, or men and women taking to the rails in search of a job or - hell - even a meal, but it's the fall from where we were to where we are that's painful. The bill we ran up with years of overconsumption, overindulgence and a naive belief in the infallibility of the free market has come due. The criminal squandering of the nation's wealth by the damndest fool ever to occupy the Oval Office hasn't helped either.

As a nation, we behaved counter-intuitively during the run up to the disaster. When times were good we spent, spent and spent, no thought for a rainy day. At least we're consistent, because our behavior continues to run counter to the best survival strategy. Many of us have come late to the idea of saving, perhaps fatally late, because spending, not saving, is the only way out of this mess.

Yet, consider the neat trap we've contrived for ourselves. Who dares spend with no assurance that his job will be there tomorrow? We have to save, just in case. But we must spend to climb out of the hole. Still, we can't spend with so much uncertainty. However, we have to spend because .... ad infinitum.  

What ho! The President, the Congress and the Senate approach - bearing good tidings! "You need not spend your pitiful trifles, good consumer," they say, "because we shall spend for you!"

And you reply: "Thank you, kind lords. Methought we should never find our way out of this economic thicket!"

And we all lived happily ever after, until ... until someone uttered blasphemy!

"Great legislative and executive lords," spoke the impudent varlet, "whence cometh the dough? Is not 'your' money our money?"

General consternation and harrumphing all around.

"Ye need not worry, child," one of the lords finally says. "We have friends in China, Saudi Arabia and other exotic locales who shall happily make up for what you cannot provide. The rest we'll just print, dumbass."

"But, but, isn't borrowing beyond our means to repay sort of what got us into this mess?" the impudent varlet persists.

"You let us worry about that, son," said the Highest of the High Lords. "After all, your money is our money, right?"  

Puzzled but silenced, the inquisitive knave slips away to invest the last of his savings in a Chinese baby food manufacturer.

So, when you think stimulus, think China, think Saudi Arabia, think of anything except how you and your children and their children and their children will owe a great debt of gratitude - and an even greater debt of gold - to our good friends.

Don't be afraid. It's called stimulus, and the government will soon soothe all your pains.

Dumbass.  

The judicial commissioner vote

When County Commission votes to appoint a person to a given office and the appointment process goes relatively smoothly, check your pockets because you've just been had. The vote that appointed Mark Brown and David Creekmore was so obviously worked out beforehand that Ray Charles would have spotted it. Although it was clear that not every commissioner had run roughshod (again) over the sunshine law, it was just as clear that enough had to seal the deal.